Nurses wash me at 5am,
Tired, as night duty reaches
End
They talk. Laugh. Avoid my dead
Eyes.
Some say I'm pretty
Say it's a pity
Clean now
Shapeless blue gown
2 more hours before breakfast
Light shines on bedsheets
CPA,CPA,CPA,CPA
Cape Provincial Administration
Sheets, pillows, smells
They turn me
1, 2, 3
over to face the mountain
Animals have arrived
all day they will graze
or just stand staring
like yesterday and the day before
I have learned just to stare
Like them
Visitor
My mother is here
Running out of ways to make me smile
Can't I crawl back inside her womb
I ask. Never know this life?
TV
Afternoon cartoons.
I look, see nothing, but the mountain
The day is clear
Birds flap by
It is summer
Life screeches outside
Dream
I leave the boxed room
I am spirit, grazing with the mountain herd
The mountain welcomes, protects.
More visitors
How am I feeling?
Am I in pain?
So-and-so sends their regards
And Jesus loves me
Lights fade
Mountain pulls on her blanket
Of night
Animals move off the slope
Out of sight
Where do they go?
I don't know.
I'll be here
Waiting for them
Tomorrow and the day after
Wishing I had a secret place to go
Wrapped in mountain
But where do I go?
Where can I go?
In this zoo,
With long night haunting
No view.
Disabled in the Taxi Wars in 1996, Shelley
Barry became active in disability politics and coordinated national
policy for Disabled People, South Africa, in Parliament for two
years. Barry is a member of New Moon Ventures, a women's theater
collective and is currently working on a play Spinning Wheels.